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Photo Credit: Me

Sunday, January 4th, 2026 

Hello Trailblazer,

I planned on jumping in right away to talk about what’s on the horizon for 2026, but my dad deserves an honourable mention first.

For the first time in about 70 years, he spent the Christmas and New Year period away from home. We usually do our family breakfast at his place - I actually featured the family home in this LinkedIn video a while back - and we certainly missed him.

He, however, didn't miss us.

Why would he? In the space of two weeks, he won not one, but two meat tray raffles at the local RSL near where he was staying with one of my brothers. They’ve practically banned him from coming back.

Dad hasn't won a lot over his 96 years, so it feels like someone is finally smiling down on him. It’s a good reminder that sometimes, the best results come from breaking a 70-year routine. The bad news is he dropped his phone in a pool - he shouldn't get too far ahead of himself.

Photo Credit: My sister in law, Carla.

Swiftie Dads and the Art of Connection 

Speaking of dads and breaking routines, I came across this video recently that serves as a masterclass in high-level relationship skills. It goes for about 17 minutes, but it is well worth the investment. Be careful when watching; you may cry - I did, and I am not even a dad.

Image: YouTube

Watching these dads navigate the Taylor Swift "Eras Tour" - some spending ten hours in a car while others learn exactly when to yell a "reckless" chant - is a clinical study in empathy. These blokes aren't necessarily there for the 44-song setlist; they are there because they’ve realised that using curiosity to enter someone else’s world is the ultimate way to build a bridge.
 

It’s a perfect display of relationship skills - dropping the ego to treat their daughters as equal peers. When a dad learns a chant just to build a core memory, he’s demonstrating the emotional connection and mutuality that defines sophisticated leadership. He is choosing to be "Fearless" in his own era, proving that the best connections often happen when you’re willing to be a bit goofy for the sake of the team.

If those dads represent the ‘sweet’ side of building connection, the 2026 forecast below helps us identify the ‘bitter’ habits we need to leave behind.

Dark Chocolate

Ok, let's get into why you are here today (and cheers to a new year, by the way...) and look at 2026 trends shaping leadership and our lives more generally.

This is my annual list of What's In and What's Out for a new year. (The 2025 version is here or here - if you'd like to crank your neck and look back. (Yes, I did eat less Doritos) 

I left alot out this year: holding things lightly, different things at different times, questioning answers, plugged in. The reason? For a little while I am covering off on the 10 Emotional Intelligence competencies identified by Roche Martin. Let's see where it takes us.

To get more mileage from the list, watch this 90 second clip first and pay attention to the tasting notes. Not the chocolate ones. The human ones. If you work with someone who leaves you with “gloom” for a week, we’ve got some 2026 updates to make.

Image: YouTube

What's in and What's out for 2026

✅IN: Self-Knowing | ❌OUT: Performative Intensity 

Internal Awareness replaces the mask of being "massively grown up". True leaders understand their own "tasting notes" - recognising how feelings and thoughts drive decisions in real-time without that "suffocating confidence."

✅IN: Self-Confidence | ❌OUT: Validation through Suffering

Communicating Your Value shouldn't require bragging about how "bitter" and "complicated" the work is. Real assurance comes from respecting yourself enough to communicate the value you bring while actually enjoying the process.

✅IN: Self-Reliance | ❌OUT: Under-the-Counter Permission

Independent Initiative is the backbone required to find your own way, even when no address is provided. Stop hunting for "secret" validation and trust your own judgement to deliver.

(If the explanations aren't making sense and you haven't watched the video, go back and watch the 90 second clip!)

✅IN: Self-Actualisation | ❌OUT: Hustle Culture 

Balanced Passion is the "Bourneville" (or Haigh's or Taza) of EQ. We move beyond the grind to pursue meaningful goals that are thrilling, daunting, and important while giving our personal lives the attention they deserve.

✅IN: Straightforwardness | ❌OUT: Performative Complexity

Values-Driven Assertiveness ditches the jargon that tastes like "burnt tyre". If people can't understand you, you aren't being "sophisticated" - you're being opaque and unkind. Delivering difficult messages openly builds trust, provided you acknowledge the other person's perspective along the way.

✅IN: Relationship Skills | ❌OUT: Resentfulness & Gloom 

Mutuality and Empowerment ensure the "aftertaste" of working with you doesn't last a week. Treat others as equal peers and focus on building bridges not "resentment."

✅IN: Empathy | ❌OUT: The "Cold Stare"

Genuine Curiosity makes connection the new superfood. We swap the feeling of a "cold stare from an ex" for an emotional connection that validates others' experiences and builds real rapport.

✅IN: Self-Control | ❌OUT: Flammable Volatility 

Calm Composure acts as the fire suppressant when the pressure is on. Interrupting a knee-jerk reaction allows for rational logic - the ability to hold the heat without catching fire.

✅IN: Adaptability | ❌OUT: Rigid Endurance 

Open-Minded Flexibility proves that enduring a bad situation isn't a virtue. Strength lies in exploring new options and letting go of resistance to things that simply cannot be changed.

✅IN: Optimism | ❌OUT: Cynical Astringency* 

Opportunity Sensing overcomes the bitterness of cynicism. Cynicism is the "89.9% dark" of the mind - bitter and exhausting. Optimism is the energy that makes the work taste better.

(*Astringency: The dry, puckering sensation from high-cacao chocolate. In leadership, it’s the cynical comment that sucks the moisture and energy out of a room.)

Refining Your Approach: Three Actions for 2026

Developing a sophisticated leadership "palette" requires moving from observation into active practice. Borrow a page from the Swiftie Dad playbook to sharpen your own Emotional Capital:

1. Enter Their "Era" (Empathy & Relationship Skills) 

Genuine Curiosity serves as the foundation of connection. Instead of just reviewing meeting outputs, perform a "Shadow Audit" at the end of your next session. Ask a trusted peer: "What was the lingering vibe of the room?" Validating their experience and understanding the impact you left behind builds a bridge of Equality that jargon never will. Ask yourself: "Am I just waiting in the car, or am I actually learning the chant?"

2. Audit Your "Chant" (Self-Control & Self-Knowing)

Calm Composure relies on the ability to interrupt a knee-jerk reaction. Identify your default stress response from the "Out" list - do you lean into Performative Intensity or Rigid Endurance when the pressure is on? Naming your default reaction allows you to choose a more deliberate, rational response instead of yelling the "wrong word" into the ear of your team.

3. Own Your Own Era (Self-Reliance & Self-Actualisation)

Independent Initiative provides the backbone to find your own way without hunting for under-the-counter permission. Pick one high-impact pivot to prioritise this month rather than overhauling all ten competencies at once (I tried that once; I didn't get away with it). If you’ve been relying on Hustle Culture, practice Self-Actualisation by setting better boundaries - saying "No" more often is a brilliant start. It’s the standard of leadership that ensures you’re still standing when the 44th song on the setlist finally ends.

The Bitter Truth

That clip about the "dark chocolate arms race" I shared at the start - where two people compete to see whose chocolate is the most bitter and "conceptually a parallelogram" - perfectly captures the trap we’ve fallen into.

My wife and I have a ritual of sharing a few squares of dark chocolate after dinner. It's meant to be a moment of connection. We've had more than a few bitter moments with the percentage of darkness dialled up to 99 in our very over-priced boutique chocolate, so it’s easy to see how quickly a moment can be ruined by the need to turn enjoyment into endurance.

In our professional lives, we’ve been conditioned to do exactly that.

We brag about the "intensity" and the "burnt tyre" of stress as if suffering is a prerequisite for leadership. We treat our Emotional Capital like that 89.9% dark bar - something to be survived, rather than something that fuels us.

2026 is where we choose a different recipe. High Emotional Capital isn’t a test of how much bitterness you can stomach. It’s about the clarity, connection, and joy you can create. It’s about the "aftertaste" you leave behind in a room.

The goal for the year ahead? Leadership meant to be enjoyed, not endured.

Curious about your own "tasting notes"?

If you are ready to trade "burnt tyre" leadership for the high-quality craft of building your Emotional Capital, let’s talk. I provide full EQ assessments and debriefs for leaders who want to see the data behind their "aftertaste." I will even throw in some dark chocolate with the debrief.

Send me a message or hit reply, and let’s start your benchmark for 2026.

Guest Post

Our regular good friend of this letter, Paul Edwards, has had alot on his plate these past couple of months, so you will see him again next month.

Expecting more?

There is so much more to write on each letter I send, but I appreciate limited attention spans and other commitments. I know you would like more, so get in touch and I am happy to chat. 

I like to think we are all little cheer squads for each other in this world and our default position is that we all want each other to succeed in business and in life, so feedback and ideas are always welcome. I know it is coming from a good place. I am even open to a ‘letter to the editor’, if you are inspired to write.

Thanks for reading this far. 

Write back and let me know what breakthrough you have had after reading this letter. What thoughts you had. Just a sentence (or longer, if you like).

Write to you next month.

Rich

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